mathis

[undread]

Comments

week 2; friday

[undread]

[well. i don't have much to say about this one. this is rough. i think laudna is hanging out by the pyre, doing her embroidery, crying nasty looking black goopy tears silently to herself.]

[cumulative]

[he's doing the same-- though with less goop. plenty of regular tears, though, even if he's short one eye to cry them with.

it's easier not to go far, so despite this being sort of public, he's stayed, taking a seat next to her with a hastily muffled sniffle.]

[undread]

[yes, come sit. she will dab at her eyes lightly with a handkerchief.]

Hello, Mathis.

[cumulative]

H-hello.

[swiping at his face with his sleeve.]

I wasn't... I wasn't expecting...

[undread]

[she will reach into her sewing kit and pull out a bit of cloth and hand it to him, too. no need to get your sleeve dirty.]

It's hard, isn't it? I know to expect losses, but despite my best efforts I keep growing attached. All three of them were so kind. It's always the kind ones, isn't it?

[cumulative]

...thank you.

[he accepts the cloth with a little nod, grateful.]

I-it is... and Iwatooshi and Cloud couldn't have been... easy to fight, either. It isn't as though they tried to kill kind people who couldn't defend themselves...

[undread]

[she looks at the pyre, frowning for a second.]

There were some who were speculating that Iwatooshi was the other one, from last week. [it's been weighing on her.] I... I hate to think of him that way.

[cumulative]

Th-they really-?

[oh. that pulls him up short, eyes wide with shock.]

But, he... he's seemed completely fine...

[undread]

I know.

[that's what's been bothering her about it, too.]

I spoke with him this week multiple times, and he was his ordinary self. Kind and thoughtful as always. He saw one of my memories and said something about it that will stay with me for a long while...

[it's not really possible to reconcile.]

[cumulative]

...he... he did the same for me.

[oh, he hates the thought of this, he really does.]

If he died for that, and they were wrong...

[undread]

I hope that isn't the case.

[cumulative]

I don't want to think... anyone would do that, unless they were absolutely sure. S-so...

I'm not going to think about it unless it... seems to be that way.

[undread]

Last week, I felt a certainty someone had acted on their own. This week, I will reserve judgment.

[cumulative]

Right. As terrible as it is to think of so many of us being affected...

[... it's better if no one chose to do it too, right? it means no one wanted to.]

[undread]

Either way, it's clear we can't afford to leave room for uncertainty about any death.

[cumulative]

No. No, we... have to avoid having any doubt.

[undread]

It's a tall task. But for the sake of all three of them, I want to know.