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mathis

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It must have been what she wanted.

[it was her choice. her decision. he was already resolved to accept that, whatever it might be.]

I think...

[she has to weigh what she's going to say for a moment here.]

I think losing control over herself, being taken over and used by the cult, must have been a nightmare to her. From what I know, I think she would have preferred and accepted death many times over rather than endure that.

But I think she also hesitated, because so many here depended on her.

I wouldn't... want her to stay only because of that. If she wanted to go.

[staying is already-- it's already hard enough.]

I wouldn't, either. Even someone as strong as she is has a breaking point.

[even if it's hard.]

...it was her choice to make. I helped keep her alive. So I knew... I would have to let her make it.

Well. I don't think all is lost for them, do you? At the least, they can write.

But they aren't here.

[that's-- a little plaintive, almost.]

I know. [but they're not gone.] You can show her that she didn't need to feel guilty for leaving.

...I'll try to.

[in a bit. right now he's not sure he can manage it.]

You don't have to try tonight.

[she just means in general.]

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